The End...?

I'm pretty sure this is the end of Jerry Springer Moments.

It's been real, it's been fun.

No grand finale for me. I just think I've grown past a lot of the things and issues that I thought made for an interesting blog.

I could be wrong. I may not even be missed. *shrug*

I'm going to continue to hold down TTDBYD and What Not to Name Your Baby, but this is the end of Springer.

In case you're wondering--I'm going to leave everything as cliffhangers. No point in dredging up past dramas. If you know me and you're still interested in hearing stories of debauchery and random funniness, you know where to find me.

Thanks for reading!

I'll end with one last "final thought"--

I've been to and seen a lot of places. I've done and said a lot of things. some good. some not so good, but at the end of the day I've always been the same person. I'm not changing that. And if you don't like it (or me) I could care less. However, I hope that I've been able to change something--the way you think about things or life or maybe even made you laugh at the fact that no matter what you're going through someone somewhere else may have it worse than you or can at least relate. So the next time you find yourself in a Jerry Springer type scenario, just put on your blue eyeshadow and your Walmart shirt and get to scrappin'

Take care of yourselves and each other.

Well...

So many moments of Jerry Springer-esque debauchery lately...

crazy people who lie about their age and children
old dudes who cheat
money issues
job issues
car issues
presentations and heart stopping moments
people getting pulled over
people getting locked out of the house
people getting hit on by old dudes
(what gives with old dudes lately?)

what else is new?

I mean I am about to get my Master's degree in two weeks and I feel like my life is well past these moments of unbridled fuckery and bullshit.

I don't speak this stuff into my life--it just tends to happen--I only write about it after the fact. The point is I'm ready to consider getting off the proverbial couch so to speak and turning off Jerry Springer.

I don't know quite how I feel about that because I've had this blog going since 2008. (roughly 2 and half almost 3 years). This is actually episode 115 so I'm well into syndication...lls. It's been an interesting and therapeutic outlet I suppose. I don't know that I've changed much in the last few years--only becoming wiser perhaps.

Then again...

I'm not canceling the "show" yet, but I am going to take some time to think about it. Any opinions--or maybe no one is paying attention anyway.

Tales From the Hood

Ok... I HAD to SHARE this!! I could not resist. smdh. This has to be the most ghetto thing I have EVER heard and FUNNY AS HELL!!!

So I've been busy working on my final projects for school and apparently someone realized I needed a good laugh today. I promise you I did not make this up...this is per a conversation with a friend of mine. I have underlined the key elements of "ghetto"

So my friend has been telling me about her best friend's sister. The sister has a a five piece and biscuit (translation: five kids and one on the way). She has apparently decided that she is going to throw herself a baby shower.

Ok... lemme fill you in on some of the details:

this chick works at IHOP. She has decided to throw the baby shower...at IHOP...

on a day that she is working (it gets better I promise you...*holding my sides laughing*)...

on the Friday BEFORE Easter (she's trying to "trump God" my friend says).

She has invited approximately 70 people (to IHOP!!!!-- insert SNORT and giggle here)

Oh but wait...

The admittance fee (???????WTF??????) to get in is a bag of Pampers and... a $10 gift card

The guests have to pay for whatever they order at IHOP!!!!!!! AND...tip the waitress (aka the ghetto hostess)

(howling laughter!!!)

And then... she has an online gift registry which includes 3 pages worth of "baby necessity items" such as... two waffle makers, a $300 coffee maker, shoes for the other FIVE KIDS, a mini waterfall and a frozen margarita maker.

/\___/\__/\____________________________ (this would be me flatlining as I die LAUGHING!!!!!!)

*Massive facepalm*...and Jesus wept!

Me Versus the World Round 1

I'm gonna need a few people in my life to put on their big girl underwear and get over themselves.

Last night was supposed to be a fun night.

Not so much.

Yeah it went downhill quick when the two people who are supposed to have my back creatively met for the first time and decided they didn't like each other. One acted an ass. The other acted an ass after the fact and I ended up having to get out on both of them--which, if you know me, for me to get angry enough to get out on ANYONE there had to have been a major offense.

So now I'm stuck in the middle of this bullshit and I'm thinking to myself is any of this really even worth it?

I'm so tired of everybody. They can keep their drama 'cause I have shit to do. I'm way past the fed up point with everything and everybody. I feel like if you don't have enough respect for what I'm trying to do or if you feel like I'm slighting you--don't wait for me to make a decision. You are grown people and you know how to fucking walk away.

Simple as that.

Now pull you big girl britches up and hold that.

Facebook Snitches On You...

Today's advice on how to avoid a WTF moment: If you are going to carry on an affair with a married woman, make sure you don't put pictures of yourself and said woman all over your Facebook page while simultaneously declaring your love...especially if you are friends with each other's spouses/significant others.


That is all.

There's No Crying in Baseball...

...or in front of people who should NEVER see you cry. No matter how much they tell you they love you, that's code for: this b!tch has lost it.

That is all.

For My Valentine...

I am not a fan of Valentine's Day.

I think what people do on Valentine's Day should not be limited to Valentine's Day. But my purpose is not to rant about that...

I don't have a "Valentine" per say in that sense, but to the person who would, could and should be my Valentine I just want to say...



This just seems to sum it all up nicely.