There's No Crying in Baseball...

...or in front of people who should NEVER see you cry. No matter how much they tell you they love you, that's code for: this b!tch has lost it.

That is all.

For My Valentine...

I am not a fan of Valentine's Day.

I think what people do on Valentine's Day should not be limited to Valentine's Day. But my purpose is not to rant about that...

I don't have a "Valentine" per say in that sense, but to the person who would, could and should be my Valentine I just want to say...



This just seems to sum it all up nicely.

Things I Wished I Had Said...

This is per a conversation I had yesterday...in retrospect this is what I should've said:

1. That was some fuck shit... the worst cop-out line EVER. The least you could've done is not insult my intelligence.

2. Yes it hurts (as in present tense damn it)!!! Throw some more salt in my wound please since apparently I am a glutton for punishment. [*major sarcasm*]

3. Frankly, I'm rather glad you said it. You just proved to me that you don't DESERVE me at all. [mad that I wasted my time, happy cause now I have free time-- I have shit to do! *middle finger*]

4. Fuck your exes--I'm glad I'm the opposite of all of them. I happen to like me thank you very much and I could give a flying fuck what anyone else thinks about me or the situation.

5. I guarantee you, you will notice an immediate difference when I'm gone.

6. For the record, I'm know I'm NOT your girl. I'm also NOT your pet project, guinea pig, personal assistant, idea generator, pass around show and tell project, advisor or kick around person.

7. Allow me to quote both Cee-lo and Chris Brown-- Fuck you and Deuces!

FML--Really?

So...

I finally make some headway with somethings I've been trying to take care of financially. JUST YESTERDAY I smashed off a bunch of money I owed to Virginia for my car...

Only to wake up this morning and I find I owe a sizable chunk of money to DC--and these bitches straight threw me the middle finger about it.

FML.

and... I quit!

I Thought This Was Supposed to Get Better

I tried so hard to come into this year with a fresh attitude and a new resolve (not resolutions, but actual resolve!!!)...yeah don't know how that's working out for me--not so good so far.

School is good--kicking my ass, but good. Plus one for that.

Work--not so much. Like my job, but... frustrated. Minus one. Actually if you count the fact that I had to induce a n***a moment yesterday, minus two.

Family--nice holiday, but kinda sliding back toward the bs factor. Zero.

Friends-- need to hang out with them more. I feel like I've not been the best friend. Minus one for me.

Personal--the BB situation. When I got back from Vegas we spoke at length and there was (I thought) some progress and development, but a week later it went right back to the bullshit. Don't know why I expected anything different. Minus 10--Epic FAIL!

At this point it's a crap shoot I guess...

I'm done.

Every story has a beginning and an end...

First post of the new year...

Can honestly say I'm glad 2010 is done. I had a pretty dope New Year's Eve if I do say so, with two of my girls at the Palms Las Vegas, ushered in by none other than Kid Capri and Grand Master Flash. A good beginning I think. I even did my due diligence and called BB at midnight East Coast time--no fanfare, no pretense and surprisingly enough BB was home. No partying, nothing extra.

The funny thing is this is the first time since I've been on vacation that I, for a slight moment almost wished BB had been here with me in Vegas...it would have been nice to bring in the year together, but it was a moment...nothing more. Then I came back to my senses and remembered there was a reason why that didn't happen...oh yeah I'm supposed to be OVER it.

As you may remember from last year, I don't subscribe to making resolutions, but one thing I won't do anymore in 2011--or any other year for that matter is settle for anything less than the best--cause BB told me not to way back at the beginning and oddly enough that was the best advice I could've received.

Thanks B! From the bottom of my heart, I wish you success and happiness. I know it was weird, crazy and emotional, but I always knew you meant well.

So some things come to an end, but my year and new chapters begin. I have lots to look forward to.

Here's to life, love, happiness and freedom. *cheers*

Frozen Over?

I've been slacking on the blogging. LOL. Looked at my account and realized I had about 5 unfinished drafts of things I guess I wanted to say at the time but never finished. Will get back to those, I promise.

For now I can say honestly I'm enjoying life. I'm relaxing in Vegas for a few weeks with my family. I can honestly say the words "relax" and "family" in the same sentence. They haven't driven me crazy surprisingly. *thinks Hell has frozen over*

Things aren't perfect, but I had a nice holiday. Still a week until I have to go back and one of my favorite people will be here tomorrow to hang out until New Years. I've really not talked to BB which is a good thing and I'm actually...

pretty happy.